Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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