I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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