i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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