lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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