we made out on top of his cat.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize