Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
two words: eviction party
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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