how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
