i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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