is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
