So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
