he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
