You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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