i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize