i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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