guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
How's work?
Spinning.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
