He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Rumble strips road head = magical
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
