yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
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you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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