I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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