Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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