in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
