Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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