There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize