'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
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