I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
