I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
