everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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