it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize