I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
