Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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