Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
