Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
