I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Randomize
