Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize