Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
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I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Never underestimate the power of titties
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