Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
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why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
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PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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