I need help removing her.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
