Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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