That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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