IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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