his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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