The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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