I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Your penis caused this!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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