Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
