I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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