I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
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