i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
