I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
