I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
