They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
