Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
