We're facebook friends in real life
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
