I'm really into asian looking animals
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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