I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
