the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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